Dating a younger guy pros and cons
It was time to have ‘the talk.’ He brought up the subject casually at first, wondering if he could start introducing me as his girlfriend.I fidgeted and gave him some story about how I didn’t like to use labels and the topic was dropped.
A popular question we get for our famous ‘Ask a Guy’ section is: “Why won’t he call me his girlfriend?
” I am not surprised at all, this situation is the worst!
Eric does a great job explaining what might be going on in your guy’s mind but I have some insights that, although from a female perspective, will be of great value as well. The experience caused me to completely shut down emotionally.
I was aloof, I was hard to read, I didn’t get too close, I was present but never available, essentially, I was a guy (in the psychological sense anyway! My ‘guy’ behavior caused the actual guys was seeing to take on the ‘girl role’ and they were always way more into it than I was (this was also due to my aforementioned heartbreak which rendered me numb).
I guess by not being his girlfriend, I was pre-emptively avoiding all the messiness a breakup involves.
Also, not being an official couple just made me feel safe, like there was still a distance between us that would prevent him from getting too close.
I wasn’t so much flattered by his eagerness as I was concerned by his desperation.
I mean, why did this guy want a girlfriend so badly? Is he so insecure that he I did like D from the beginning, and I may have grown to really like him if he had given me the chance rather than trying to force me into feeling how he wanted me to feel when he wanted me to feel it.
I felt very uncomfortable and resentful, not to mention furious with myself for caving in which I couldn’t undo, and it just got very ugly from there.
The reason I felt compelled to share this experience is I think it may help to see things from the other side.
’ ‘It’s too soon,’ ‘I don’t like labels,’ ‘I’m not ready to be in a serious relationship,’ blah blah blah.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating