Dating in middle age

While Frederica holds out hope of supporting herself if need be, Lady Susan must string together a haphazard sequence of long-term visits and mysteriously rented lodgings in order to keep herself and her daughter housed.

Much of the movie revolves around her efforts to badger daughter Frederica into marrying a wealthy simpleton who tries to wax eloquent over garden peas and thinks the Bible has 12 commandments.

Her daughter balks at said “stallion of romance,” but Lady Susan thinks he could give Frederica long-term safety from homelessness and hunger.

In ten years, he and I have grown in very different ways, and what I value—even what attracts me—has changed greatly.

Though I still battle fear that “God’s best” might turn out to be lifelong singleness and barrenness, this new perspective on my past helps me hold my old dreams more loosely.

Those weren’t her exact words, of course, but the gist of what she said was that our odd quirks and habits become more prominent as time passes, and our rough spots get rougher without enough close human friction to sand-smooth them down.

My cousin was probably younger than I am now when she said that and free to date without today’s many online “aids” to romance.

Not only does it sand down my odd quirks, it also frees me to take romance as it comes.

Men don’t have to be more than dates to me because I don’t require romantic success for support, validation, or even regular interaction with children.

And I definitely fit the definition of a “cool chick” – and my guy friends will confirm:-).” Unfortunately, the pool of men that I’m dating from (early to mid 40s, usually divorced) are pretty messed up.

A number of them want younger women (never mind that I look much younger) – didn’t anyone tell these guys that women hit their sexual prime over 40:-)?

In fact, however, Lady Susan has a far more precarious position than her daughter.

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