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All singles who profess Christ and aspire to marriage — even as a possibility — have this responsibility (even outside this area of life, we should all be trying to grow in Christ). If you're already sure of that basic answer, are you a growing and mature Christian?

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In my view, if you can't happily picture yourself married within a year, you're not in a position to date.

Third, once you decide that you are ready to date, look to God's Word to decide the kind of person to date, and evaluate potential dating partners on those criteria, rather than relying primarily on the world's treatment of ideas like "attraction" and "chemistry." I wrote at some length on this in my article, "Brother, You're Like a Six." For you busy singles with time for only one mildly irritating column per day, the summary is this: Pick a potential dating partner with an eye toward godly manhood and womanhood — with an eye toward who would make a good husband or wife, defined by those characteristics esteems in His Word, not the ones Hollywood likes.

If you aspire to be a godly husband or wife someday, what have you done and what are you doing to prepare for that ministry?

Second, are you at a place in your life at which you are ready and able to marry?

If you don't desire that sort of protection or aid, at least insist that the two of you begin to meet with others who know one or both of you well so that there will be consistent accountability and an outside perspective on how the relationship is going.

Humble openness to accountability is essential to a godly relationship. It's not exhaustive coverage, I realize, but this should at least get your relationship started on broad principles.

First, the man should initiate asking the woman out.

Whether this means approaching the woman herself or her father or someone filling that role instead of her father, it should be the guy that starts things off.

If you're still in school or not out on your own, disregard this for the moment. Your intentions and your feelings, to the extent that you can discern them and it is appropriate for you to share them, should be clear.

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