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When there's one thing you don't want to do.Actually, there might be many things you don’t want to do.
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But follow that up with, "And I want to take this slow.” If your partner challenges you, repeat yourself, putting physical distance between your body and theirs.
At this point, their reaction will give you some important information.
And nothing that you've done or could ever do in the future would make it your fault. When you're already hooking up with someone, shouting "NO! Maybe you just want to slow things down without bringing everything to a halt.
If you think you might want to be sexual with someone in the future, just not today, it’s important to communicate that clearly.
Delayed gratification is completely okay and, for what it's worth, can actually be attractive, so take advantage of that.
Start with something like, “I’m really into you," to assure your partner that you're not shutting this down forever.If you care about and trust each other, being open about how you feel is always a good idea.You might owe them an explanation, but you do not owe them anything else.But unfortunately, we live in a world where that doesn't always happen. And make a commitment to yourself that if you’re ever in a situation where your body doesn’t feel safe or where you don’t feel respected, you will tap into that power and say “NO! If you're ignored, realize that this is sexual assault and it is not your fault.So get comfortable putting your foot down with a big, powerful, "NO." Put your hands on your belly and take a deep breath. When you speak, contract the muscles in your abdomen and use the power inside you to propel the breath up, through your body, into your throat, and out of your mouth in the form of the word “NO! Even if you're unable to say the word no, if you never consented in the first place then it is still sexual assault and it is still not your fault.It also means that from a young age, we find ourselves chasing an impossible, unfair goal: we must be seen as sexy, but not too sexy. There are, of course, some things that simply are out of your control. At before or during (and after) a sexual encounter, you are in control of your body.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating