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Is Dev Ops helping organizations reduce costs and time-to-market for software releases? Find out in this Information Week and Interop ITX infographic on the state of Dev Ops in 2017.In a recent column, you said you never hear from married couples whose sex life got better and more frequent over the years. My wife and I were married 24 years ago, and we are currently having more sex and better sex than we did in the first years of our marriage.There are many reasons why, including therapy, antidepressants, and weight loss and subsequent surgery—but I would have to say that the big reason is communication.
I am a straight male with a highly stigmatized kink.
I was deeply ashamed of my sexual interest even before my mother discovered my porn when I was 14 and told me I was a pervert that no decent woman would ever want.
To the surprise of no one who has ever given sex advice for a living, the sex didn't get better after IMDONE and her boyfriend got married.
"Here's something I've never seen in my inbox: a letter from someone explaining how sex with their partner was infrequent, impersonal, uninspired, unimaginative, etc.
We were (and still are) introverts with poor communication skills and anxiety/depression/mental-health issues.
I won't say it's been fairy-tale perfect—the kind of perfect that makes you barf and roll your eyes—but it's been pretty damn close.
If I had a partner who was unwilling to talk about sex or try to fix it, I'd kick his ass to the curb without blinking.
So with the help of counseling, I got him on board with dirty talk during sex (because it's important for me) and I worked (and still work) on telling him what to do when we bone.
I was a very experienced woman (five years as a swinger and partners numbering in the high double digits) when I first met the man who would become my husband. We also had an amazing friendship, and we were never as happy apart as we were together. We went from once a month to a couple times a week. It's not as frequent as it once was, but it's really good when we have it. Am I the first or the hundredth person to write in? I suspect you don't see it in your inbox very often because this isn't what most people would consider a problem and we don't want to waste your time!
It helped that we shared some kinks and were both up for what we agreed would be a nice and mostly companionate marriage. Turns out he needed that emotional attachment to feel safe and secure enough to open up and relax and enjoy himself. All it took for the sex to get better was practice and paying attention to cues and solving problems.
For me, being comfortable with my husband and secure in the relationship made it so much easier to communicate and work on fixing the problems together.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating