Tips on dating a smoker

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Over the years I became complacient as I was trying to meet people and date. Over the past few years I briefly dated a few women who smoked and it was not too bad to deal with.

Then last year I met a woman online who I liked but found out the day I met her that she smoked.

3 packs a day for 20 years, with a chronic cough, deep voice...

If only just a friend, I would be concerned, let alone someone who is in love with her. A typical smoker will die ~15 years earlier than normal?

After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads. I am a non smoker who started dating a heavy smoker. I have had a very hard time dealing with this for some reason and feel it has changed me forever.

The whole ordeal has left me depressed and devistated.I have always been against smoking as I saw what my Dad went through, he was a chain smoker for 33 years until he was set free when he (lucky for him) got very sick for 10 days and was hospitalized; when he left the hospital he thought he better not light another up as he had gone this far and made it! I never smoked and always found women who smoked a turn off.From the stench of Tabacco on their skin, hair and clothes, wrinkled skin, yellow fingernails, deep hoarse voice and sickening "smokers" cough, I was repulsed.You learn what drives you, and by keeping the focus on yourself (not them) that is where change occurs in your quality of life, and quality of relationships. Read up on enabling, on co-dependence, on the 12-step program Al-Anon for people who find themself in relationships with addicts. Let's just say the smoke gets to parts you'd rather it not be. I'm sure she knew it was bad for her and gets tired of people telling her how bad it is. It was too bad things didn't work out with her because except for the smoking, there was nothing wrong with her. At my former reserve unit, half the guys chewed some sort of cowpoop-looking stuff. I've dated countless women and it has always amazed me how little they know about men.My in-laws are pushing 80 and are still quite active... Damn I'm feeling old today.think "addict" instead of "smoker" in terms of the relationships you find yourself pulled into and the people you find yourself involved with just knowing or saying "i don't want to be with an addict" is not enough to change your behavior and relationship patterns. She even chewed gum to help her breath so it wouldn't be so bad to kiss her.

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